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My name is Sybil; I’m a mother of three, and I wear a size 0.Ohhhh……What did you just think? Was it pleasant or was it negative? Yep, I’m a skinny lady and love it! However, many people have a lot to say about skinny people. Â Yes, skinny people are victims of body shaming.
“Do you ever eat?” “You’re so skinny.” “You need a steak or something!” Yeah, that’s what I heard for several weeks as I walked my youngest child to school. Every morning I walked past a small group of moms standing together making little comments about my body. We are all grown, shouldn’t these type of things be behind us? Sadly it isn’t.
Body Shaming Is Hurtful To Skinny People Too
Many people don’t consider it negative talk about one’s size when they are referring to skinny people. They will quickly follow up with, “Girl, I wish I was your size.” But, why are you saying such negative things about my body, about me?
Yes, I’m a skinny woman that has given birth to three children. Yeah, I’m proud of it! But, I wasn’t always so proud.
As a child, I was picked on for being skinny. People called me chicken legs, Olive Oil (I’m showing my age from the cartoon Popeye), twig and anything else you can imagine. They would tell me I was going to blow away with the slightest bit of wind.
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When I became an adult, it didn’t stop. There for awhile, it seemed worse than when I was a kid. Why were these women so mean to me? Why did guys overlook me as a teen and young adult? It was because I wasn’t “thick”? Well, I’m glad the guys ignored me because I am blessed with the best husband ever. He loves every bone in my body and my chicken legs.
Yes, Body Shaming Is A Thing For Skinny People
Do you realize when you make statements to skinny people you are doing the exact thing the world says about “curvy,” “fat,” “overweight,” “meaty,” “big-boned,” etc. people? Skinny people take those comments and begin stuffing and overeating with the hopes of gaining the weight everyone around them say they should.
I am naturally thin. I tried adding extra calories to my daily intake by having milkshakes every night, eating junk, etc. Nothing worked. One day I woke up and asked myself why I was doing these things? To please others? To make others “accept” me? Yeah, that was what it boiled down to. But why? Why can’t I enjoy the body God gave me? There’s absolutely nothing wrong with working out and being fit, but we ALL must learn to love our OWN bodies for what they are.
I am now a mother of three skinny little girls. They come home sharing things other kids say about them. They call them names, make remarks about their size and seem shocked that they eat. Hmmm….yes, skinny people eat, and we LOVE to eat.
Body shaming affects everyone. We have allowed the idea of a “perfect” body to take over our lives. Your body is perfect the way it is, just love it!
When I see news reports or read articles about how ads should move away from featuring skinny women and show more curvy women I cringe.
As I watch interviews or read social media posts stating that a model is a sell out because they are trying to be like those “skinny people,” that hurts.
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All people should be able to shine and be the face of brands. No one should ever feel less of a person due to their size, rather you have curves or not.
Stop the body shaming and learn to love EVERY BODY.
Love Your Body No Matter The Size
Remember always to shine regardless of the comments made to you or about you. Â You are always and must be your own shining star.
I’m going to share more post about body shaming and the affects it has on people. Â Just because we are skinny, it doesn’t mean our lives are any easier than the next.
Have you ever made a body shaming to anyone? Â Have you been on the receiving end?
This post was originally submitted as a guest post at ThatDarlinMarie. Â Some changes have been made by me.
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Your article has really helped me out! Lately, people’s comments have been getting to me and for the first time I was doubting my body and which made me feel sad and uneasy about it. I definitely got to be stronger when people comment on my body. I wish people would not comment though! ❤️
I’m glad my article helped you. I totally understand, was right there with you a few years ago. Love your body!
Greetings MomJonz!
I can’t express how excited I was to read your blog on body shaming. I can COMPLETELY relate to your situation, and then some! I am a 42 year old mother of 2 beautiful children! I have ALWAYS been thin since childhood, and have had all sorts of comments made about my size from strangers, friends, family, and coworkers. Like you, the comments seemed to have gotten worse as I got older! I used to cry myself to sleep on several occasions, and just envy those who appeared to have “normal’ shapes. I used to feel cursed as a child (and adult) on my size. The comments were hurtful from “how much do you weigh,” to “Do you eat? There were (are) many others to add to the list 🙂 🙁
After reading your post and other responses, I realized how these comments has prevented me to appreciate what God has given me. I am healthy and have a beautiful family who LOVE me for me! Just today, a stranger at the grocery store looked at me and said ” You are so Tiny!” I wouldn’t normally say this to a larger person, but you are really tiny! I just looked at her did a small smirk, and kept quiet. Sometimes it’s the silence that makes people realize how foolish they really sound. I am not going to lie, even at my ripe age of 42, I felt uncomfortable with myself, feeling as though everyone who sees me sees this unattractive female.
I am learning each day to appreciate myself by working out—yes, I said the word–work out—lol! And really appreciate the results. I am small built but in shape, and feel really proud of that. I need to keep that positive mindset and continue to set a good example for my kids 🙂
Thank you for your post and words of encouragement!
Oh Chauka, this made me smile. I love every word you said! And omg, workout! YES girl! We need to workout too. I recently started working out and love the tone that is taking place. BOOM! The sad truth is many do not realize their words about our size is hurtful. Keep your spirit and yes, love you for you and be that bright example for your family. You are a blessing to them and to so many out there. I’ve recently started another site…skinnyfitandfabulous.com to talk about life as a skinny lady. The things that many dismiss. Hope you go check it out.
Thank you for reading and have a blessed day. Your words encouraged me today as well!
Greetings!
Thank you for your prompt reply! I so appreciate your encouraging words of wisdom! I do appreciate my workouts, and my hubby does too—lol! My daughter’s friends can’t believe how “buff” I looked when I flexed my muscles—lol! That really helps boost my confidence! Then you get those comments that takes all that hard work away 🙁 I do know that there are so many people with distorted views on how a person is supposed to look according to their mental script. If we don’t fit a certain look, we are automatically given a label. It’s interesting because people who make those ignorant comments don’t think their being disrespectful because it’s accepted to be thin, or what some call “TINY!” I’m sorry, but I am so TIRED of being labeled that. Yes, I am aware I am small, why does it matter? It makes you wonder the petty stuff we focus on in our society—ridiculous! Wouldn’t it be nice if someone could comment on how pretty your shoes are, or love the color of your hair. Why do people feel compelled to target one’s physique? I honestly feel that those who make such foolish comments suffer from poor self-esteem issues themselves, thus, make it appoint to bring others down. I’ve had family members make such foolish comments about me over the years, along with coworkers asking me how much I weigh. I ‘ve actually had someone ask one of my former colleagues if I was anorexic —-really???????
I tell ya, when will this ever end? In the meantime, I am lucky if I can go one week without a stupid comment or a stare, like I’m some kind of freak or cyclops—lol! It does wear on you after awhile, and you begin to internalize what others perceive of you. However, I am learning that what others see of you is their personal perspective, and what constitutes beauty.
Thank you again for your words and wisdom and encouragement!
Chauka
You are beautiful. I can’t stand when people only think body shaming only hurts plus size, it hurts all sizes. So I completely understand your concept and appreciate your post.
Thank you. So many people miss that it effects all sizes for sure. Hopefully, I can bring a bit of awareness.
To be honest, I have never been in your position…lol… but no one should ever have to feel ashamed for their looks. We were all made differently on purpose. If we were all the same, life would be boring. Live a healthy lifestyle and it won’t matter if you’re a size 0 or a size 20. xoxoxoxo Rock on, girl!
This was exactly what I needed to read today! I’m also a mom of 3 girls who happens to be skinny! They called me Olive Oil too!!! Just last night I had a mom make a few comments asking me if I ever eat…yes…I eat!! A LOT!!! I’ve just always been tall and luckily thin but the body shaming definitely goes both ways no matter what your size is! I also seem to get the most comments from other moms, now that I am a mother. Great post! ?
Yes! It always seems to be from other moms. And it makes me think, “what are you teaching your child(ren)?” Just stop! But, as I say…work it! No matter what your size is, strut your stuff! Thanks for stopping by and I’m glad I was able to bless you today.
I’m naturally skinny as well and receive the same comments. I’ve tried to gain weight and tell people my struggle but only to hear, “I wish I had that problem”. Really? No you don’t. I’m also underweight. So I don’t feel myself, I’m weak and I tire easily. So when I look for encouragement and tips from friends, I continue to hear those words “I wish I had that problem”.
I recently started working out, and I’ve been able to maintain my weight. I guess it’s muscle building. But now I’m like…I’m rocking my skinny!!! 🙂
I was always skinny when I was younger. Age has helped me develop curves now I’m in my 30s but people would roll their eyes if I ever said anything about my weight like I was supposed to have no body hanguos just because I was slim
I always tell people that us skinny folks have our hangups too.
It’s so sad in our world that no matter what everyone gets shamed and judged. You are rocking and I’m glad you don’t let the others get you down!!
As I say, ROCK ON! lol
I love this, thank you so much for posting. I absolutely love posts that are kind, uplifting, and encouraging. You keep doing what you’re doing, because you are obviously reaching a lot of people!
Thank you
Thank you for posting this. You look and sound like a happy and healthy person. I am glad I found it. Now I just need to convince myself that there is nothing wrong with the way I look…
I’ve been struggling with depression for several years now, and being made fun of for being naturally thin, is one of the many reasons to add to the list of reasons for this.
I’ve basically been told that no man will ever want to be with me because of my size, and many other hurtful things. You see, I currently live in a ghetto neighborhood, and most of the women around me are huge (almost unhealthily huge) but they believe they are sexy because all men turn around to take a look at their ass and all types of nonsense attention seeking women enjoy enticing men to do.
This is getting to the point where I don’t even feel comfortable being outdoors. My arms and legs are thin, and during the summer I’m still wearing jeans because I’m too self conscious. But my arms still show because I wear sleeveless shirts due to the unbearable heat
I am a vegetarian, but my size has nothing to do with this. My whole family (from both sides) are naturally thin. So it’s not a nutrition issue, it’s just the way genetics go. But I also get picked on for my diet choices (not eating animal flesh) ….
I do find it funny though that these women drink coke all day, eat doritos, greasy and fat foods, yet have the nerve to tell me I’m unhealthy. I eat A LOT, but A LOT of nutritious food. Maybe once in a while I become like one of them and have a coke (like once in a blue moon), or eat a pint of ice cream in less than 10 mins (again, once in a blue moon)
I mean, can they really look that attractive once they take their clothes off? I’m not really interested in finding out since I am not into women, but I wonder how they reconcile the fact that having more dimples than a golf ball is not attractive at all, while still thinking they are the best thing that happened on the block.
I know I may sound bitter, but I’m just hurt, and maybe that’s why it sounds like that.
I want to learn to love myself regardless of my size. After all being petite is not a crime. Like you said “why can’t I enjoy the body God gave me?”. I am grateful to God though cause compared to a lot of people I am basically perfect. I can walk, I have all my body parts, and my senses are still functional. There are a lot of people out there who cannot move and will have to spend the rest of their lives in a wheel chair, or laying on a bed. so I definitely do not want to sound ungrateful towards God.
I want to reach out and give you a hug as I read this. The one thing I have to say is, “STRUT your stuff girl!” And I understand everything you said. But the truth is, many times these women are insecure and instead of them focusing on themselves they put their time and energy into degrading others. I love your last paragraph, and you know what? You are so right. You got this, love you and your body that you are blessed with!
Healthy eating and loving yourself is all you need to worry about.
Thank you sister. I am humbled by your response.
God bless you. And praise God for blessing you with the husband He sent you. I love reading pictures, and that picture of you two is just beautiful. I can tell he is proud that you are his woman… his wife!!!
Hugs.
He is my King and Night in Shining Armor. Poor guy in a house full of females. lol We’ve been married for 15 years, and I’m blessed to say it still feels like we just met.
This is so, so, so true. I’m glad you’ve found your confidence.
I’m so sorry you’ve had to deal with so much bullying. You’re beautiful just the way you are!
I say it’s more of people needing to be aware that body shaming goes both ways more so than it being a bullying situation.
Love ya, Sybil. I’m glad you know your ok no matter what negative others say. Yes body shaming hurts. I’ve been messed with being skinny from a kid on up. The only weight I used to gain was being pregnant then it was gone after each of 4 kids.
After being sick for an extended period I gained a ton of weight due to inactivity in the hospital and medicine. So I get to hear the negative on this side as well.
A few friends I know that are models are required to be almost anorexic to stay skinny. Since they photograph looking 10 lbs heavier it’s required to weigh little. What the heck….you need to starve to be skinny and those who are slim naturally are made fun of.
This world around us has a really skewed perspective of what is ok. And sadly judge by what they see rather than getting to know or see a person of value.
Thank you, Cindy. We all speak before we think, but it seems you get slapped both ways for being skinny. And oh, don’t say you are going to workout, and you’re skinny. My oh, my.
Girl, you rock your “skinny!”
You know it! 🙂