October is Self-Promotion Month, a great reminder that now, more than ever, is a good time to put energy into yourself and your future. While it may be easy for some, it’s especially difficult for moms as they deal with a busy family schedule, work commitments, and unplanned life events. Add in a divorce and trying to maintain a new normal for your children and this task can become even harder.
Below are some areas that you can invest in as a newly single mom to make sure that you don’t lose your sense of self during and after the divorce process.
One of the top stressors when going through a divorce is the worry of how to pay for everything. By creating a plan and sticking to it, you can take the uncertainty out of the next few weeks or months. A great place to start is by writing down or creating a simple spreadsheet with different categories of incoming money and outgoing costs.
This may include:
- Short-term expenses: utilities, car payments, and housing fees
- Long-term expenses: saving for retirement, emergency fund, college tuition for children, and buying a new house
- All income sources: full time and part time jobs
- Any outstanding debt and your plan to pay it off: student loans or credit card debt
From Spendee to Monny and many others, there are plenty of digital budgeting apps for women on mobile devices to help deliver an even greater sense of convenience and peace of mind. While on your phone, digital meditation apps also offer a great solution to give yourself a few short minutes before or after accessing a budgeting app to decompress from everything going on around you.
For many, it helps to be physically surrounded by loved ones during the divorce process. While it may feel like a daunting task to move your family during a divorce, it can be immensely helpful for your emotional well-being. For example, moving closer to your parents may mean that your children have their grandparents as another part of their support system and extended family close by. To help in this process, many free online tools are available to plan a move. Online mortgage preapproval tools can help determine how much you can comfortably afford, in order to keep your new home buying process on track and within budget.
With many returning to traveling since the lockdown has begun, there are always options to fly for an extended stay at a family or friend’s house to regroup and feel supported. Many U.S. airports regularly service inexpensive domestic flights year-round across the country.
Being in a positive, optimistic headspace throughout your divorce is an essential part of getting through this process. From going out or staying in, there are a number of ways to reinvent and reconnect with yourself. If you’re looking to stay in, try an old hobby that you gave up on or didn’t have time for anymore. If you’re looking to go out, ask friends to try out a new spot in town that you’ve been wanting to try to put yourself in a positive mood.
Even doing something symbolic like creating a capsule wardrobe can make you feel like you’re leaving your old self behind and giving your new self an opportunity to shine through.
Divorce is no easy transition. Remember to always give yourself a chance to grieve before making any major decisions, and be kind to yourself as you grow and change. By reinvesting in yourself and taking care of your mind, body, and soul during this time, you can come out stronger than ever before with a new perspective on life.